Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Dog Days and Bindi Soccer

I have absolutely nothing to blog about. It seems my opinions have left me, my enthusiasm is waning, my life experiences have all blurred into a cloud of 'can't be bothered', creativity is zero and nothing very exciting (at least not in a positive sense) has happened to me for a couple of weeks. I wish I could get passionate about an idea, politics, the economy or the fact that Ricky Martin has finally come out after all that vida loca but nothing . . I am in mellowsville enjoying an introspectathon of mammoth proportions. Perhaps I'm just friggin knackered. Hopefully the malaise will lift after the much needed Easter long weekend and I will become impassioned once again and ready to rant and rave at length. Thanks Jeff for your encouragement but the spark remains, damp.

In the interim, I'm going to do what any self-respecting dog lover would do and show you that you don't necessarily require opposing thumbs to make tools, you don't necessarily need friends to have a good time and that a party for one is entirely within the realms of possibility.

First, you need a brand new soccer ball that you've pinched from your careless next door neighbour slightly punctured and softened for 'portability'.

Then a stick. Not too long, not too short, not too thin and not too thick . . trim to size



Place stick firmly in mouth so that each end protrudes equidistant from the jaw and get the ball rolling so to speak with a sharp and forceful push with the top of your nose. This is a particularly difficult manoeuvre for snub nosed breeds such as Pugs, Pomeranians, Bulldogs and Boxers . . don't try this at home especially if you're a Pekingese.



Once a degree of momentum has been reached, maintain the pressure with the stick and push the ball around the back yard for upwards of 20 minutes in a frenzied canine soccerfest. This technique works particularly well when employed in water also providing the ball is not too heavy.


Finally create that crazed 'I couldn't stop if I wanted to' expression and play this frequently and for as little or long time as you desire depending upon stamina, proximity to tea time, whether your ball is confiscated or you tread on bindis. (I'm not referring to Steve Irwin's precocious daughter!)

A very nice man repairing our pool pump n0t so long ago told me "Your dog has a wonderful time all by herself" . .party pooch. I want to come back as a middle class dog!




39 comments:

nick said...

I sympathise, I'm going through a similar malaise at the moment. Maybe it's something to do with the recession, all the gloomy faces and the dreary weather. Hard to summon up any real passion about anything.

Yes, being a middle-class dog seems to have its attractions right now.

Roy said...

I dunno, Baino; that's a damned fine post for someone so supposedly uninspired. I'll read that over a rant any day!

Anonymous said...

Roy is spot on. You have a gift Baino, even when you think you're writing nothing! That was a humorous posting and what's that about Ricky Martin; coming out of the closet perhaps?

Don't Bug Me! said...

I was thining middle class cat, but a dog would be good too.

laughingwolf said...

what's 'middle class'? :P lol

Alan Burnett said...

Yes, for someone who has nothing do blog about you blog about nothing mighty fine. A great piece which certainly found an appreciative audience in this household.

JeffScape said...

AB is correct.

Funny how you managed to "type anyway," isn't it?

:P

The Jelly Monster said...

Awhhhhhhhhhh puppy!!

Anonymous said...

Your dog could take part in movies. There are some where animals act "sportsmen". I saw once a movie where the monkey played hockey.

Bimbimbie said...

Tsup*!* She's one smart pooch, the best my pom can do is shake a dropped sock!

... so do you think Ricky was the last person to realise he was? I thought I was re-reading a 10 year old news report when I read that yesterday...

Enjoy your navel gazing, that's when the best thunked things materialize*!*

Tom said...

your Lilly is just like my youngest son...he used to spend hours playing with sticks in the yard...can she play the saxaphone, too?

Megan said...

I have never not enjoyed a post here. Never.

Ronda Laveen said...

I want to come back as YOUR dog and party pooch. What a gal!

Meaning: you and the dog!

Babysis said...

Aww beautifuls is too clever....you need to write a book! Any kind, doesnt have to be deep and meaningful - you could make a motsa on a kids book - look at the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series! Young Joeleth has read them over and over and over at least 15 times each book - I kid you not!

RLM Cooper said...

Baino! Fun post. Nice dog! :)

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

In my next life I want to be your dog, Baino!

River said...

I love your dog. If you follow her antics with your mind, does that constitute a daily dose of excercise for you? so much easier than running around....

I have a case of the blahs here too, I think it's going around. I noticed a similar thing happening in blogland last Easter. Something to do with extra work, shopping, baking, decorating, entertaining guests, etc. and all of this just too soon after the Christmas/New Year shenanigans, plus the added continued warm-to-hot weather, especially the warm nights making sleep just that little more elusive. Once the "party" season is over and the cooler weather settles in, people seem to bounce back fairly quickly.
Now sit back with a cup of tea and throw Lily another stick.

xxx said...

Hi beatuiful Baino,
it's good to empty out ans sit for a while with yourself.
Before you know it you'll be rolling a ball around too.

love to you
and enjoy change

xx Robyn

xxx said...

PS...
the photos are fantastic x

Rowe said...

I think it is a dog's life, after all, Helen. Fabulous creatures they are, so long as they've been loved and treated well, as dearest Lilly obviously is. She doesn't have a care in the world, does she!? We inherited a pug with the house mum bought when I was a kid. He was black, his name was Raymond, sweet little fellow he was, very gentle, but suffered terribly when it was hot. There was no luxury like the backyard pool Ms Lilly knows about to dip her poor paw in, hehehe. Hope your spirit lifts soon.

Isabella Golightly said...

I so hear you. I haven't cleaned up a spill in my fridge for about 6 weeks, I can't be bothered to sew anything & all I want to do is sleep. Even blogging has become a bit of a chore - hell, let's go shopping!

Mim said...

Well you may not be passionate about this but it's a wonderful post, what could be better than an happy Labrador - and such a gorgeous one at that!

Elisabeth said...

Lovely docile dog you have there, Baino. Ours is barking his head off, too young to mind his manners and too much to handle for me at present, nine pm and blog time.

I'm new to your blog, via Blurb from the Burbs and pleased to meet a fellow Australian, albeit from Sydney. I'm from over the river below in sunny Melbourne. I look forward to visiting again.

Grannymar said...

Why do I get the idea you like that dog? ;)

Great piece for someone with nothing to say. Keep saying nuttin! :D

xxx said...

beautiful baino i just had to drop in to let you no that the pics are from the northern teritory not perth ;)
though we are still very dry here x

xxx said...

oops meant to read territory ;)

and bunnings is one of my favourite stores xx

i beati said...

a stick and a ball what more do we want !!Happy Eastert my friends sandy

Janice said...

What great pictures. That is one smart dog! Happy Easter...the malaise will pass.

Alpacas. Wow. Good to know.

jay said...

Well, if that is a blog from a woman with nothing to say, I'd hate to see you when you really get going!

It's a great post! Lily looks to be enjoying herself enormously and seems smart, too! But I do think you need to go round the yard on your hands and knees and pick up those bindis for her! ;)

Yes, I do know it's a big yard. Tee hee!

Ed & Jeanne said...

Dog pictures always save the day!

Vagabonde said...

I like your dog and I like your post. You can take a small idea and work it into a very enjoyable post. I have many ideas for mine because, since I am 200 years old, I traveled a lot and can write post on my trips and recollections, but my writing is slow and uninspired – yours is always witty.

Colette Amelia said...

I know the feeling all too well. I thought it might be the winter doldrums but isn't it summer there?

Maybe it is like one columnist explained she doesn't blog like many others because she believes there is only so many words in us...

a little break to recharge and something seemingly interesting to write about...but here again you did it so very well with the dog soccer!

take care! Happy Easter

Kate James said...

Great post and ditto to all those comments about 'if that's your post when you're uninspired...'. You write really well.

Shame you're not closer. Would be nice to have you in a meditation class. Maybe I'll run one in Sydney one day...I'll let you know if I do.

The flat spot will pass. I hope it doesn't last long.

Paddy in BA (Quickroute) said...

It was just yesterday I saw this little pint sized dog wrestling a football down the hill - gas to watch

kylie said...

wonderful pictures, fantastic dawg!
great post baino

Jill from Killeny Glen said...

For a woman with no ideas this was a entertaining! I am a sucker for a story with photos of an ingenious pooch!

lettuce said...

pets can be a life-saver in cases of zero creativity i find. I can feel a cat post coming up.

but i think you could write entertainingly about pretty much anything baino, or indeed nothing

Kath Lockett said...

I wanna come back as a dog too, Baino. Your Lily is utterly gorgeous.

Oh and for someone who feels uninspired, you still make me want to read what you've written and I'm still smiling. Plus, you've got THIRTY SEVEN comments - I'm dancing on the ceiling if I get SEVEN!

Kate said...

To blog or not to blog - that is the question?
I'm dreadful - if I've got nothing to say - I just don't try to write but having said that - if you were like me I wouldn't have been laughing at the antics of your lovely dog! So you carry on!!! :-)