I was unwell today, bit of stress and and a touch of too much chili jam in the burritos last night I expect. S0, after coming home from work early, snoozing a little, washing my floors because housework clears the head and distracts me from 'issues' right? Then doing what comes naturally . . I started trawling the net for appropriate casual work either in the evenings or on the weekend:
Promotional Models
Hi girls, We are Sydney's fastest growing monthly Tech-house nights in Kings Cross. For our next event on Easter Sunday we need outgoing, go-getter, positive and passionate-about-music girls to hand out flyers and attract club goers into the club on the night. Please email us with a photo of yourself. Given that Kings Cross is our red light district, I think not.
Flat Cleanup and Cooking Help
I am looking for a girl who can help us in general cleaning and may be help in cooking as well if she can. we prefer Indian /punjabi girl. good pay/hour time adjustable.
I cook a mean Rogan Josh
Pregnant Model Required
Hello, I am the owner of a maternity wear company and I need a model who is pregnant, ideally 7 months or thereabouts. The tummy is needed for a close up shot for some packaging (wearing jeans). Ideally size 8-10 with good legs. A great face is a bonus, as we may to a "lifestyle shot" , but it is a really good tummy with nice belly button that is very important. Half a day's work. Good pay. Hmm could probably get away with that one .. wonder if they want an 'innie' or an 'outie'?
Cleaner (BINGO!)
Needed for 2 and a half hours work is a girl willing to work in lingerie uniform. Employment is on a regular but casual basis. All is supplied and only general cleaning and office duties will be required. For more information and interview and almost immediate work 5:30pm; email with pic to: Do I get paid extra because there's 'more' of me?
What? . . . It's Lingerie?
So many opportunities!! Which one will you choose??? ;-)
ReplyDeleteBest of luck on your search! I'm not sure if its any easier in Bris?
Look for some temp work doing filing. You just file everything under 'T' for 'The'. You probably could do this in your underwear as well.
ReplyDeletegood lord, are these real? you're not allowed to specify sex in US ads, although it always comes thru, who else would be a pregnant model.
ReplyDeletesounds like you have lots of oppotunity there baino..lol.err...a few sound a bit odd.
ReplyDeletelol..this is so funny. you are so funny Baino. I'm still chuckling.
ReplyDeleteAustralia offers plenty of job opportunities!
Not exactly equal opportunity employers are they. Do such laws extend to your neck of the woods?
ReplyDeletei wish i could go to work in my pajamas.
ReplyDeleteWell now all you need to do is become a 20-year-old pregnant Punjabi girl wearing lingerie, and you'll be spoiled for choice.
ReplyDeleteYikes!
a cleaner in lingerie? who pays the dry cleaning bill?
ReplyDeletethese are hilarious. equally hilarious is lorna lilo's instruction on filing.
it's a temp agency for you, honey hells. you are a valuable commodity skill wise. of course. i can't comment on your backside although i'm sure you will qualify there too if you choose the right lingerie.
hee hee
"Flat Cleanup and Cooking Help"
ReplyDeletewhen I first read that I thought I read FAT Cleanup...Ewwww.
Variety is the spice of life!
Best of luck to you Baino.
Hmmmm... Slim pickings for the mature adult there. Not too far different from the situation here. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteDepressing to see the sort of jobs you have to resort to if you're desperate to keep yourself solvent. The blatant sexist overtones are appalling. I hope you can find something that at least leaves your self-respect more or less intact.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if I could qualify for that lingerie modeling job. I guess not; wrinkles and love handles are not in this year.
ReplyDelete"Pregnant model required"... never heard that one before!!
ReplyDeleteVery amusing job opportunities! lol
ReplyDeleteI can certainly empathise, although your ads are more creative thsn those I've seen here...
ReplyDeleteBest of luck!
Those adverts are good for your health if not for your purse. The time spent laughing will bring down the BP!
ReplyDeletehappy hunting!
You downunderlings certainly have some interesting choices for work. Thanks for the cultural cross-section and good luck with the lingerie.
ReplyDeleteFind out how to make money with your blog. It can be done. Talk to bocktherobber.com he's doing it and he will advise you. I have no doubt you'll make a killing Baino.
ReplyDeleteI'll do it need money to pay fora new health care bill sk
ReplyDeleteYou had me laughing at the really nice tummy comment! LOL!!!
ReplyDeletetoo funny, including the comments!
ReplyDeleteJaysus - the mind boggles at what you'd have to wear to ANY of those job interviews!
ReplyDeleteSubmit some of your articles to the paper - they'll love 'em and pay you for it! Write about your experiences with Troll Bitch and the job market, and your kids and life, and darling deceased husband, and.... and..... everything else that keeps so many regular readers coming back for more!
Susan and Stony River beat me to it. Love the image.
ReplyDeleteInnie.
ReplyDeleteOh you're all very silly. Actually these were 'online' ads on a site called Gumtree that is quite popular here and yep, legitimate! Crazy world. I think I'll keep looking for the shelf-stacking job!
ReplyDeleteAh, yes, the classifieds, they don't get much better online, either.
ReplyDeleteAnd I thought barmaiding jobs were hard work - I wish you luck my friend!!
ReplyDeleteWell I have a 2nd job--it's my design business --keeps me going and exhausted too as i do it as many hours as my regular work and when I add up the hours i work for about 1/3 of minimum wage, if that. Oh dear me. Go for the Indian chef job! you get to be spicy at least. :)
ReplyDeleteA temp filing job sounds good, but if you follow Lorna Lilo's advice to file everything under T for "the", you risk calling down upon yourself the wrath of K, who frequently has to sort out the files after some temp has speedily buzzed through her job by filing everything under T.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Let's expand on Kath Lockett's thought. Does your home have a name? If not, get one, then market your stories as a book titled "Life At *****", with some sort of subtitle that will grab the attention of potential buyers.Naturally, you don't publish ALL the stories, keep some for a sequel book. You could become a best-seller.
ReplyDeleteEmail with pic and it's for a cleaning job?!
ReplyDeleteHere's a thought...how about writing as a second job. Maybe for a local newspaper, or magazine. Your writing is wonderful - you'd bring such a good view to local news.
ReplyDeleteAll you need is a dark spray tan, some prosthetics and a visit to Victoria's Secret & you're in. Can't wait to see the pics!
ReplyDeleteThese are funny Baino. Hahaha! I want to see the pic of the person looking for a cleaner in lingerie uniform.
ReplyDeleteWow, those are some pretty great options. I think you may have to decide once you interview.
ReplyDelete"Cleaning" in a lingerie "uniform"? I'd like to see the (gal?) who landed that one!
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAH! I wrote a "Help Wanted" piece a few months back. You should see if you qualify for any of those positions.
ReplyDelete;)