Wednesday, April 06, 2011

The Golden Boy Cometh

"I'm at the terminal about to go through the gate. Turning phone off. I'll call you if there's a delay" was the last message I received from my Arrogant American friend who is due to visit from 6am tomorrow. Seriously. We have a night curfew on flights here and so no flights land before 5:30am. So I'll be the bog-eyed woman who forgot to put on trousers and turned up in her Panda pyjama pants to welcome a weary traveller with a sore foot at sparrow's fart tomorrow.  He wanted me to dress as a chauffeur with a sign bearing his name. I think not baby puppy.


I had my reservations since he's been hot and cold about the visit and part of me still won't believe it until I see him walk through that arrival lounge, but I'm looking forward to meeting a man I know so well online, in the flesh so to speak - he's been a good but difficult friend. It's a nice distraction from the shit that's been happening and his own level of hygiene has seen me clean my house like a dervish, (Do you have any idea how much bug splodge gets caught in the sliding door channels?) The the pool is clear blue (swears he's going to swim but it's a bit chilly down under). I detailed my ancient car and planned a road trip in quest of, among other things, the elusive Gippsland worm.  I've even organised a nice St Andrew's Cross spider to dwell above the family room curtain rod. I'll photograph of course, although I've been given permission to blog just 4. Why 4? I have no idea, the little blossom's camera shy. Then I'm known about these parts as the "Paparazzi" and can be very sneaky if motivated, so we shall see.


Blogging might be furious, or, it might be intermittent. Either way, I love having visitors. I love hanging out with him online, but having someone here actually makes me visit places I appreciate but rarely go,  or even visit places I've never been. It can be rather nice being a tourist in your own state. Although I hasten to say, one thing I haven't booked is the mooted 'skydive'. Gonna keep quiet about that one.  Perhaps I'll get away without doing it.


Wish me luck punters. Impressing an American is a hard thing to do in the Antipodes. I have the impression that everything in the US is the same but better. I'll have a crack anyway.  He constantly tells me I live in an uncivilised country with a crappy version of English, that we're all drunkards (er might have a point there) and live a barbaric way of life because we don't know what a 'summer sausage' is. Apologies if visits are thin on the ground. And an appeal to those who would like to visit . . . what would you like to see given that we're a vast desert land and have a limited cashflow?


Oh and if you ever make the long haul . . .there's a very comfortable sofa bed with your name on it.

28 comments:

Kath Lockett said...

He'll have a wonderful time. That's why he's coming over - to see YOU!

Tom said...

haha. he's a bit of a shit then. i plan on showing up down under one of these years, or months, who knows. i could easily fall into an uncivilised state of being, and i wouldn't dream of pushing you out of a plane

Mim said...

Have a wonderful visit and no...everything is not the same in the US but better. My impression of you Aussies is that you'll all independent and way cool - living in harmony with nature. And I'm really not sure what summer sausage is anyway.

have fun hels

Ocean Girl said...

Oprah was impressed.

I am so excited for you Baino. Blog2us! We'll be waiting at the check-out counter.

Brian Miller said...

have a great time baino...i know you will...

Betsy said...

Finally!

Tell him hello!

:)

C.P.Adorio said...

Is this the friend who just took off and made you so worried and made you give him a diagnosis? Hahah! Have a wonderful time. I hope you get to know each other even better. Enjoy.

Grannymar said...

just relax and have a ball! You are on holiday now too!

nick said...

Well, hopefully we'll be visiting in December. And we won't be as fussy and superior as your Yankee chum. We don't think Northern Ireland is the centre of the universe.

Janice said...

Enjoy! Loved that picture...

Tina said...

Enjoy! Good luck being the sneaky paparazzi...we expect a photo-blog of the entire visit. At least a decent, well-lit head shot!

Carolina said...

About time!
Exciting. Hope you have a great time. Looking forward to the pics. In answer to your question: I'd like to see you, the sun, a nice glass (or bottle) of wine, your horses, dog, kids and your pool. And of course your sparkling sliding door channels. If I were me, or him (although he might not be interested in the horses and the dog). Anything else is a bonus ;-)

Pam said...

What the hell is a summer sausage? I'd take the time to research it but I'm too busy leading the barbaric life.
Looking forward to hearing about your adventures.Enjoy!
(word verification is 'evothyt' -great word so I'll us it to say hope your adventures are postively evothytic!)x

Baino said...

He's arrived and crashed on the couch. It's all good.

blackwatertown said...

Wonder how he would have felt if you had turned up in your pyjamas brandishing a sign that said "Arsehole" - everybody would have been watching to see who it was for.

But seriously - glad he's arrived. No doubt the arsehole sign will happen to me some day now that I've mentioned it. Karma.

I had a go at meeting someone I only know online at the weekend. I was in New York (over from the UK) and she lives in the state. It didn't work out in the end. She couldn't make it in. So your guy should count himself lucky you were there to meet him.

Vicky said...

Just saw your last comment, snap a pic of him asleep and post it on yoru blog that will show him how uncivilised we are LOL

kj said...

hells oh hells....

all i can say is WHEEEEEEEE!

love
kj

River said...

I'm expecting lots of details and photos of this visit in the next few blogs after the golden boy leaves.
And I MUST know what a Summer Sausage is. Please find out for us.

Baino said...

Apparently, a "Summer Sausage" is a salami type sausage that you don't have to refrigerate WTF?

laughingwolf said...

yeah, don't have to put summer sausage in fridge, but who wants grease dripping of their sandwich?

enjoy both... if he brought any

Liza Ursu said...

"because we don't know what a 'summer sausage' is"
that is FUNNY!!!
have fun. skydiving? I don't think I could.

kj said...

well well well well well well?

Mim said...

Hope you are having a smashing good time

Alan Burnett said...

Put up a picture of him. I've always been convinced that he was nothing but a Google artificial intelligence sub-programme. (Oh, and have a great time - both of you)

PattiKen said...

You think we here in the States have everything Australia has, but better? I can promise you that there is not one roo nor wallaby on any golf course here, and especially none toting "a chilly bin" (how can any form of English with a term like that be inferior, I ask you?) full of champagne. And summer sausage is nothing but a stick full of processed left-over scrap meat and organ meat, nitrates and nitrites, and salt (lots and lots of salt), all appealingly stuffed into a length of some poor animal's intestine. You're not missing a thing.

What would I want to visit were I to come? A grocery store (I love grocery stores in foreign lands; one learns so much about a culture there) and a zoo. Beyond that, driving -- well, riding, you guys do drive on the wrong side of the road, which I've done and HATED -- about the countryside. Hey, I'm pretty easy.

Have fun.

Ropi said...

Have a pleasant weekend with him. I should clean our house up.

Megan said...

So how's His Highness holding up so far?

;)

unstranger said...

Your take on things Baino is always refreshing. And there is nothing in or about America that could ever hold a candle to Oz so don't be worried about impressing on that score. Have fun.