I have absolutely nothing to blog about. It seems my opinions have left me, my enthusiasm is waning, my life experiences have all blurred into a cloud of 'can't be bothered', creativity is zero and nothing very exciting (at least not in a positive sense) has happened to me for a couple of weeks. I wish I could get passionate about an idea, politics, the economy or the fact that Ricky Martin has finally come out after all that vida loca but nothing . . I am in mellowsville enjoying an introspectathon of mammoth proportions. Perhaps I'm just friggin knackered. Hopefully the malaise will lift after the much needed Easter long weekend and I will become impassioned once again and ready to rant and rave at length. Thanks Jeff for your encouragement but the spark remains, damp.
In the interim, I'm going to do what any self-respecting dog lover would do and show you that you don't necessarily require opposing thumbs to make tools, you don't necessarily need friends to have a good time and that a party for one is entirely within the realms of possibility.
First, you need a brand new soccer ball that you've pinched from your careless next door neighbour slightly punctured and softened for 'portability'.
Then a stick. Not too long, not too short, not too thin and not too thick . . trim to size
Place stick firmly in mouth so that each end protrudes equidistant from the jaw and get the ball rolling so to speak with a sharp and forceful push with the top of your nose. This is a particularly difficult manoeuvre for snub nosed breeds such as Pugs, Pomeranians, Bulldogs and Boxers . . don't try this at home especially if you're a Pekingese.
Once a degree of momentum has been reached, maintain the pressure with the stick and push the ball around the back yard for upwards of 20 minutes in a frenzied canine soccerfest. This technique works particularly well when employed in water also providing the ball is not too heavy.
Finally create that crazed 'I couldn't stop if I wanted to' expression and play this frequently and for as little or long time as you desire depending upon stamina, proximity to tea time, whether your ball is confiscated or you tread on bindis. (I'm not referring to Steve Irwin's precocious daughter!)
A very nice man repairing our pool pump n0t so long ago told me "Your dog has a wonderful time all by herself" . .party pooch. I want to come back as a middle class dog!