Friday, July 10, 2009

Friday Fuckwit (again!)

Why I sagitate and prognosticate that the honourable gentleman is overwhelmed by the exhuberance of his own verbosity!

This week's Friday Fuckwit is again our lovely tight lipped Kevin 0 sevin - Kevin Rudd, our illustrious Prime Minister gets another guernsey today. This is the man who uses language to suit his demographic. Only a couple of weeks ago, he was spouting Aussie Euphamisms (and getting his metaphors mixed) with "Fair shake of the sauce bottle mate!" For goodness sake, who says that! Not even a ribald Aussie blue singletted labourer would sprout such rubbish.

This week, he's sniffing around the G8 meeting in Germany, even though we aren't a member, and spruiking Australia's environmental and carbon reduction policy (laughable because our carbon footprint is huge considering our population).

He's known as the only world Leader outside China who can speak Mandarin so he has no problem communicating with one of our largest training partners but he has been having a little trouble with the English language and this week he left German translators sprouting gobbledegook!

Kev gave a little speech and among his illustrious and incomprehensible phrases was the statement that, “it was unlikely any progress would emerge from the Major Economies Forum by way of detailed programmatic specificity.” Try saying that three times, it makes Mrs Mugillicuddy's Rough Cut Punt sound like a cynch!

The poor old foreign translators didn't have a clue and I think he's left a few English speaking journos wondering as well!

C'mon Kev, keep it simple . . .even your own Government has a policy of 'plain English' . . Crikey mate! . . Fair suck of the sav! Better learn yerself how to speak proper digger!


24 comments:

otin said...

programmatic specificity?! LMAO!

laughingwolf said...

lol... you should write for comedians, baino ;)

Kate said...

See - there is your new job - translating for the powers that be!! You'll be quids in there!! (if you can keep your face straight)...

i beati said...

he's a negative little cutie isn't he??

Ces said...

Try transalating Obama, you will really vomit then!

subtorp77 said...

Ach! Dumkopf! Mein ears haf the bleedink from dis idiot! Er ist Schweinsprechen, ja?

Ignore the translator Baino, he's forgotten his meds again! Looks like Rudd's two for two, wot? Think he'll try for the hat-trick? Of course he will!

Grannymar said...

I don't care about the serious stuff... I am saving Mrs Magillacuddy for the next party!

Candie Bracci said...

LOL,that was so funny!:D

nick said...

Sorry, I've no idea what comment to make, as I'm temporarily suffering from a lack of detailed programmatic specificity. I'm sure you'll understand. Oh all right then, no clear plans.

Renee said...

Laughing my head off and I don't even know the guy.

Too funny.

Love Renee xoxo

Brian Miller said...

lol. i wonder do we sapeak in such riddles to make people supposed we know more than we really do, because they most certainly don't understand...having trouble spelling his line there, so...i'll just say happy friday! have a great weekend!

Kris said...

Stone the flamin' pink galahs!

Megan said...

I need a slang dictionary here sometimes. Most times. Okay, almost every post. But I love it just the same. I can usually work out the meaning from the context.

Kev not so much.

Baino said...

such a wanker sometimes Otin - Kev, not you! He's actually very articulate but forgets himself sometimes.

You think? Wuffa . .

Actually Kate I did apply for a couple of Ministerial Liaison jobs, writing briefs for Ministers in 'plain English' maybe thats why I did't get the job . . couldn't spell specificity let alone say it!

Haha . .that's a spoof there Beati. He's OK as pollies go.

At least you know what the man's saying! He loves our Kev!

Haha . . had 'em in a bit of a spin I believe Subby . . then nobody knows who he is over here so doesn't matter really.

Can you say it after a few Gins GM? I'm not bad at that one or the Pheasant Plucker's son . .

Ah Candie, we aim to please!

Well thank you Nick. Why didn't he just say that, the knob!

Neither does the rest of the world Renee!

Brian I can't stand boardspeak or sounding like you've been playing the Funk and Wagnall subliminally while you sleep. Call a spade a fuckin' shovel!

Now Kris, you're an Aussie, ever heard fair shake of the sauce bottle? Buggered if I have. I thin we both know who he Galah is here.

Struth Meg, don't come the raw prawn it's English for cryin' out loud.

kj said...

i don't know what kevin looks like but it's not hard to imagine. as for our u.s. guy, it's at the very least refreshing to have a president who can string a few three syllable words together.

the word 'fuck' has been quiet in blogland. it's a good thing you use it on fridays. too good a word to rust out...

xoxo!

Bimbimbie said...

Tsup*!* See I tried warning everyone about the silly arse, we had to listen to him on breakfast radio before he got top billing of the opposition and he Still got voted in. I think Mrs M would make far better speeches and not be at all scared to tell the Chinese Government naughty naughty in any lingo she chose*!*

River said...

“it was unlikely any progress would emerge from the Major Economies Forum by way of detailed programmatic specificity.”
Ha Ha. Reminds me of a quote or two on my current calendar.
"Much work needs to be done before we can announce a total failure to make any progress"
"It's amazing how much easier it is for a team to work together when no-one has any idea what they're doing".
Computer is fixed with needing the very expensive services of the doctor. Two anti-v***s programs (not tempting fate by spelling the word)working in tandem seems to have done the trick. It took longer than I thought it would and I was getting a little desperate. Guess I shouldn't expect miracles.

River said...

Oops, that should read "withOUT" needing....

lettuce said...

pffft

i still can't get used to "monetize"...

Ropi said...

Wasn't it in Italy? Or am I confusing it with something? I was totally isolated in Croatia.

Baino said...

River it's actually good enough for a calendar don't you think? Glad you're up and running again.

Lettuce, that's the sort of language I understand!

Ropi, sorry I wasn't clear. The G8 was indeed in Italy but most attndees seem to be taking advantage of the meeting to do a European Tour . .our Kev was 'hanging around' and meeting with some G8 attendees and the phrase was actually uttered in Berlin.

Cinnamon said...

Hi Baino!

All politicians are the same- you need to take a course in 'Politicish' to get any hope of getting any meaning out of any of them. Whatever they say seems to translate to 'I want this answer to make me look good'!

Very funny post!

How are things on the job front?

The Jelly Monster said...

The Foo Fighters are the most amazing ever

jay said...

I'm so glad to hear other countries have crap Prime Ministers too! ROFL! At least yours doesn't wobble his jaw and then leave it hanging slackly open at the end of each sentence.