How did it happen? I'm the mother of a 26 year old daughter and a 24 year old son who's getting married next year. I never had an issue with my age until quite recently. Probably due to a penchant for younger men, my wrinkles and cellulite being more prominently on my mind but seriously, 26 years of being a mother? Shit, where did it go? I'll be dead soon and that's a scary prospect. I've lived well over half my lifespan.
Clearly my family planning was well, up the duff. I have two birthdays in December then Christmas. Clare on the 4th, Adam on the 11th.
Still I'm totally in love with and very proud of the fruit of my loins. They're awesome kids. They've done everything I asked of them, everything I wanted yet remain individuals, independent and crazy personalities all by themselves. Nurture only goes so far but they are incredible. It's taken a long time for me to realise that.
Clare left home three weeks ago and those of you who were around when she traveled in 2008 will know I didn't cope well with her absence but this time it felt right. We talk more than we probably did before and she's home most weekends for some mum hugs and home cooking. She's just a delightful, intelligent, level headed, fun loving, young woman and I'm incredibly proud of her organisational ability, independent spirit, fiscal good sense, travel lust and the affection she shares. I love her to pieces. What daughter would take their teary and depressed mother on the dream trip of a lifetime? Or never utter a recrimination when her idiot of a parent crashes drunk into a kerbside. I can never, ever repay her for the way she made those four weeks feel. Awesome just doesn't cut it.
Adam's still at home but is my rock. He's helpful around the house and that's saying something. Five acres is a lot of maintenance and he does it willingly whether pool care or hedge clipping, putting bins out. He's a good conversationalist and there's nothing I enjoy more than sitting in the garden, drinking wine and chatting. He gives the best bear hugs and is a fine cook. No faults at all other than an ability to lose socks and a reluctance to keep his room clean. He still terrifies me with his thrill seeking and I'm not happy about the Honda CBR 1000 but he loves it. He loves riding it. He loves the 'man time' with mates while Amy gets on with the wedding stuff. He's turned himself right around over the last year with a good job, new motivation and I love him like a limb, more than a limb, he's half my heart.
I've said it before, my children are two of my best friends. They know me better than I know myself and I am truly blessed to have had them. You know the best bit? They are actually friends with each other. Happy birthdays my darlings, Lasagne's in the oven. Cheesecake in the fridge. See you soon.
There is no word for the way I feel about you. Love just doesn't cut it.
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35 comments:
that is so great, Baino. good "kids" indeed and handsome to boot. Your daughter must be very tall, btw! Anyway, it sounds like they really include you in their worlds too so that is fantastic. Yes, where did 26 years ago, eh? Well, you;re showing us well here. Good fruit indeed. :)
Mt Toast . . the shot at the top is my son's fiance. She is tall at 5'11 but hes squishing down. My daughter is 5'7 perfect. Please link your email.
deservedly proud of the lot of 'em and a handsome bunch to boot!
What a lovely, heart-warming blog to read, Baino. To have two kids that you love like a lioness with the added bonus of being friends is an honour indeed. I hope to be writing something similar about my eleven year old in 13-16 years' time.
great post, helen!
your love & pride are so obvious but you havent been revoltingly sentimental.
good job on the post and the fruit
Well, happy belated birthday to them. My mother's and some of my (girl) friends' greatest problems with me are the following: my emotional deficit, because I rarely smile. I have to add that thy cannot appreciate anything, because when I smile from time to time they complain that my smile is like when someone is about to do something nasty. :P Their other problem is that I don't talk much and I answer mainly question but don't provocate a conversation. My brother is different. He is very social but lazy at school.
Great to know you all get on so well when many families just get on each others' nerves. You're a lucky lady.
I loved where you said felt right and part of my heart - true Mom words. My son does not sound that happy in his new job or residence in Pittsburgh..sigh
aw--yer a lucky one, and don't start crying aout your mortality..stay away from kerbs and you'll keep on ticking for ages
This is such a lovely post Helen,right from the heart.Have a lovely day.
rather beautiful, indeed. The whole post from top to bottom. It is so great that you have that kind of relationship with your children. My mom and I could never be best friends.
Hmmmmm... Your December looks to be a pretty busy one! And didn't Adam recently get engaged? Soon the nest will be empty. Sounds like it'll still be busy on weekends and holidays, though. You're truly blessed.
Your children are very handsome (pretty) and you are blessed as you already know. I like hearing about all the things they do for YOU. Why? Because I think we all go through that stage where they are self-involved and unthinking and it hurts. I did. Of course, I did the same thing to my parents and I guess it's the reason they're glad to see the goslings go.
Anyway, lovely post.
Such beautiful babies you have! Congratulations on doing such a good job with them.
They truly are a handsome pair. I give GREAT CREDIT to YOU for how they have turned out. You are such a cool Momma. I do hope that my crew are great friends as adults and come 'round to hang with us from time to time!
Happy Birthday to your Babes! (HA! The fruit of your loins!)
What an utterly gorgeous pair they are. You have every right to be very proud. And what great photos. Happy birthday to them both! xx
yappy barfday, kids! and many more! :)
What a great tribute to your children! Beautiful. And I think it is so wonderful that they enjoy each other's company.
Lovely, Baino, and happy birthday to Clare and Adam!
Birthday greetings to one and all! It is a wonderful blessing to have loving offspring and special friends all rolled into one!
That is an absolutely delightful post - really wonderful. Those kids raised a good mum
Tender loins! Your children are beautiful! Such blessings. How is your face? I read and saw the pic and the trauma nurse that I am, could not stand seeing you hurt. I could not comment. It looked so painful! Hope you are better. Tsup!
This is a sweet read Baino. It's really lovely when parents and siblings all get on well together.
3 of mine have a similar relationship, great friends. Then there's the black sheep. But I love him just as much as I do the others.
Nice Post!
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A very warm and loving post. You are all very lucky to have each other ;-)
Fabulous post! I feel the same way about my kids although they are only 12 and 9. Actually, my daughter just turned 12 on December 11th as well! Happy birthing days mom!
Awww and I bet they just love and adore their fruit growing mother*!*
Loved this post Helen.Dear daughter,( was 27 this birthday) is a December baby too. The birthday food request? Lasagna. Enjoyed the photos of your beautiful family.
O wow, she really does remind me (and look like) my Aussie cousin who spent 3 years in London. 3 of my best ever years. Amazing. Trust you to have a daughter just like her!!
ps thanks for all the messages, supposrt and patience. do you think i'm actually doing it now?????
frankly i can't believe it, hence the half-arsed question. gledwood never fucking does anything. especially not wholeheartedly. unless it's something with a high irrelevancy quotient. e.g. learning Chinese... etc etc
!!!!
and support. as well as supposrt ;->...
Beautiful kids. You have reason to be proud.
And there is no way you'll "be dead soon." Good grief. Just stay out of gutters.
Awww...this post was just wonderful! And what lovely kids!
A supportive mum is above rubies.
Wonderful!!! And I know just how you feel.... well maybe more so as my second one has flown the nest....
We surf the same planet Helen and our lives are very different but eerily the same.....
If it works this time I'll be a Grandma in May - Wow - where did the time go.... I'm still 18 in my head!
Stay as sweet as you are - your kids will love for it.... I know mine do!
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