Friday, June 17, 2011

Friday Fuckwit

O Hello. I don't think I have many readers left thanks to my lack of visitation but for those who have stuck around,  I value your loyalty.  

I haz a job. Well a long term contract for a big company in quarrying and stuff. So back with a bunch of engineers and Excel spreadsheets which I hate but seem to end up working with. The guys are nice, there's a great canteen and free biscuits so no complaints. And the rate is a little better than the 2nd largest soft drink manufacturer in the world.  Now I just have to live on toast until I can recover from taking a rather expensive month off in April but hey, it's all good. 

So for your Friday pleasure, an idiot convict. Coming from a country populated by the buggers, I guess it's appropriate:

FORKS, Wash. (AP) - An escaped convict was caught following a day on the loose after he knocked on the door of a cabin in the woods - only to find out the man renting the lodge was an off-duty guard at the prison he just fled.
Authorities said 39-year-old James Edward Russell took off from the Olympic Corrections Center near Forks on Tuesday morning. Just after midnight early Wednesday, Russell - still wearing his prison uniform (well that's a dead give away) - went to the cabin, knocked on the door and asked to use the phone, said Department of Corrections spokesman Chad Lewis.
The guard recognized the red, prison-issue shirt, a scuffle ensued and Russell took off again, Lewis said Thursday. The guard, whose name being withheld by the Department of Corrections, reported the incident and Russell was caught later that morning by other corrections officers about from the facility near Forks, on the Olympic Peninsula.

Oh dear . .  . one born every minute. Have an awesome weekend. I just hope I can get my washing dry, meet up with a long lost friend, buy a wedding outfit, and well   . . . get my creative juices going amid housework and recovery from completely fucking up a spreadsheet today. Thank you to my lovely boss who's only comment was, "Take it easy, just slow down a bit."

Happy second Honeymoon to Tom at Half Moose with a Twist. Trust me, I'd rather be in Mexico right now. Then I don't think they'd appreciate a third wheel.


And this because I'm tired, cranky, over it and sick of feeling whingeratery:


25 comments:

Brian Miller said...

you might want to scope out the place before you go knocking on the dor..ha...have a great weekend...

Betsy Brock said...

happy weekend, Helen!

I saw on LinkedIn that you got a new job! Wonderful! I mean, free biscuits? What's better than that? ha.

PattiKen said...

First, to answer Betsy's question: I once had a temp job at a brewery. There was a beer tap (free) in the coffee room. That's better than free biscuits... Still, your new boss sounds like a good one. The advice applies to everything, no?

So what are you over? And from whence comes the whingeratery?

Hope your weekend gets it all done, my friend.

Roy said...

Great news on the job! As for the escaped convict... I can't totally agree; after all, who expects to fine a prison guard in a cabin way back in the woods?

Anonymous said...

Good luck with the job! I started my driving lessons today.

Anonymous said...

You'd almost feel sorry for the lad - definitely picked the wrong job being a criminal hehe And hey - I need to find myself a job with free biscuits!!!

e said...

Congrats on your employment, happy may it be at last!

laughingwolf said...

grats onna new job, baino... but... wtf is that video?

Kathy G said...

Yea for you!

River said...

I don't know much about spreadsheets, but I heard once that sometimes they'll f***k themselves up on purpose just to make us look stupid.
Take it easy and settle in before putting on the speedy gonzales hat.
are they good biscuits or cheap'n'nasty?

Vicky said...

Well done on the job :)

nick said...

I suppose it never occurred to him that given the prison there might be a fair number of prison officers living in the immediate area. Doh!

Great news about the job. Now you bore all your friends with fascinating stories about quarrying....

California Girl said...

Glad to hear you're working again and for more pay. (Thank you Jesus!)

Gledwood said...

Ang on, you have to be dead clever to escape from prison, don't you? Or was it an open prison..??

別の色の馬


今晩は皆さん

Thanks for your message chez moi. Looks like I'm finally moving out to this nutter house... at LAST. If they'll have me. If only they'll have me, I'll go... I so hope I can go, I'm depressed out of my mind where I am now, it's all too, too much...

Anonymous said...

I googled that fellow. Thought he was from Oz. The prison website gives scant info and says nothing at all about fellows escaping. Good luck with that excel shyte. Can't stand it myself.

Janice said...

I hope the new job goes well. Sounds like you have a mellow boss, always a plus.

grannymar said...

Great news on the job! Enjoy the biscuits. Being paid makes the toast sweeter!

Grannymar

Tom said...

¡hola!
bad luck, i guess he should have ditched the uniform...¿wouldnt that be the first thing on the todo list..?
¡mexican keyboards are whacked!

Carolina said...

Ah! Many congratulations on your new biscuits/job/boss/income! Nice video/song. (d'you think I have a thing/penchant/something for /'s? I might have. Hmm.)
Hope you've found a great wedding outfit/your long lost friend/a dry spot to hang your washing.

The escaped prisoner isn't one of the luckiest people in the world I guess. Ah well. Shit happens.

Have a nice week. Good luck with the spread sheets. You just have to learn to love them ;-)

Darlene said...

Oh yeah - we have more than our share of stupid prisoners here in the USA. In fact, we have more than our share of stupid people and they vote. Sigh.

Vagabonde said...

I just read your last posts and felt so terrible about your rainy day with your car problems and work problems. Now I find that you have a job – c’est magnifique as they say somewhere in the old country. Have a great week-end – well it may have already passed for you, so have a great week!

Tina said...

Stupid is as stupid does. Great story! Congrats on the new job! Since it sounds like you work with spreadsheets a lot, you probably already know this trick. When I'm trying a maneuver that may be risky, I first save another copy of the spreadsheet. Then when horror of horrors an entire column disappears or some other such tragedy, I can just revert to the old one. Also, I found that maybe saving not quite as often also helps. Then you haven't saved your mistake. Just close the file without saving and you'll be back to where you were. I mean no judgment of your capabilities in these words, just sharing what I learned the oh so hard way...

Tina @ Life is Good

Anonymous said...

Ooo that was fast work getting a job, yev put me to shame and I still (inactively) looking! Well done girlieface, and good luck. Like the video... yer wan looks just like Holly from Red Dwarf.

Gledwood said...

You got a job as a coal-miner? Well done!!!

Gledwood said...

OK I know I know a quarrier and a miner are 2 different things. Quarrying means it's open cast mining you'll be doing... smashing at that cliff face with a giant steel ball on a string! How exciting!!

How exactly do Excel spreadsheets figure in all this? Will you have to wear a hardhat at the computer?

Don't dump your blog! I don't believe you!!!

Leaving the bloggersphere in outer darkness... nothing from Bimbimbimbimbie either... what is the world coming to?