Monday, March 16, 2009

What's in a Name

Think hard when naming your kiddywinks:
Stan Still, 76, said his name 'has been a blooming millstone around my neck my entire life', Doug Hole didn't want to talk about his, and Will Power was just grateful he had always been known as Bill.

Imagine trying to lead a normal life being named Justin Case, Barb Dwyer, Mary Christmas, Paige Turner, Jo King, Lee King and Barry Cade.

Thank your lucky stars you're not called Rose Bush, Pearl Button or Hazel Nutt, who also make the list of The Most Unfortunate Names in Britain.

Mr Still, a former RAF man from Cirencester, Gloucestershire, recalls "When I was in the RAF my commanding officer used to shout, "Stan Still, get a move on" and roll about laughing. It got hugely boring after a while."

Even surnames can be comedic, my Optician is Penny Pain. I had a farrier called Geoff Slaughter, I was delivered by Dr Love and no lie . . my obstetrician was Phil Cocks (I just hope he had the good grace not to call his daughter Ophelia).

Parents really do need to think carefully though when choosing names for their children. Their name will be with them for life and what may be quirky and fun for a toddler might be regretted terribly when that person becomes older or even a grandparent perhaps. I named mine very simple names Adam . . now how can you mess with that but he's AB or Abe . . .Clare's name is constantly mispelled but it doesn't worry her although she's the alternative "Baino" or Clarebear or Clarence . . . seems you just can't win.

A search taking in the US turned up Bill Board, Annette Curtain, Carrie Oakey and Anna Prentice.

I’m still reminded of a lovely boy with whom I attended high school called Warwick Hunt . . think about it!

I've posted this before but . . .hell, it's still funny!


Grow Up said...


That is all.

Grandad said...

I worked with a bloke called William Anker, or to give him his official title - Mr W. Anker. Poor sod.

Do you know there is a firm of solicitors in Ireland called Argue & Phibbs?

Mrsupole said...

Okay, I have tears in my eyes from watching that video, I know I have seen it before but it is still funny as can be when all the guards burst out laughing. One cannot help but laugh with them.

Oh my goodness, some people with their names and you have to be careful with the three initals on top of that. If your last name starts with certain letters you have to be careful. Say if it is an S. You cannot have an ASS, it is a P, you cannot have an IMP, a T, you cannot have TIT. The list can go on. Some parents do not care. Oh and when they pass on the name of ancestors from long, long ago. It can be so sad for the children. They are the ones who have to live with it.

Sometimes it happens to the women when they get married and take the husbands name. Oh well, what can you do if you fall in love and this happens.

Anonymous said...

Baino, obscure reference: there was a pulp fiction writer ,back in the '40's & '50's, who went by the name of Justin Case. I thought this rather brilliant, given the mysteries he used to write. And don't get me started on Michael Hunt. Had one of those poor blokes in the Army. Another had the last name of "Crocker", so we always called him "Betty". He was a good sport 'bout it, tho' :)

tut-tut said...

Can you imagine purposely coming up with these combinations? Poor kids.

Candie Bracci said...

My name is Candie,really,so..
Hopefully my father wasn't called Kane or Floss!

Anonymous said...

Most favourite scene from a film EVER. (Weally, Centuwion? I'm surpwised to hear a man like you wattled by a wabble of wowdy webels.)

There's a poor bloke in the UK called Drew Peacock. His parents obviously didn't see that one coming.

Gledwood said...


Anonymous said...

Hehe I love them. I have so many colleagues here with hilarious names but they are best shared in private over a drink rather than in public :-)

Nancy said...

Yes, I once knew a girl by the name of Anne Heyser. Nothing to laugh about, right?

UNTIL, she married a guy named Joe Bush. That was when the fun started...

laughingwolf said...

don't forget michael hunt... when shortened to mike :O lol

Anonymous said...

laughing wolf, see my earlier comment! It's so true!

Brian Miller said...

lol. Had a customer named Richard Dick, of course the shortened version is a terrible thing for a mom to wish upon their kid. I often wondered what were they thinking.

Terence McDanger said...

You're a woman after my own heart Baino, this stuff cracks me up.

Warwick Hunt! Bwahhahahahhahaha!!!

Ophelia Cocks!!!! Will ya stop!

Megan said...

When I broke my arm, my orthopedic surgeon's name was Dr. Hook.

Slightly frightening for a 10-year old.

Thanks for the vid, Baino, I needed that on a Monday morning!

Baino said...

Hehe Grow Up . . you could have been christened R. E. Alperson!

Really Grandad? There's one called Dewey Cheatham and Howe!

Still makes the giggle rise in me too Mrsupole. I had a friend who became Mrs Head!

There's a squillion when you get thinking about it Subby.

I'm sure a lot of them are accidents Tut but still, you have to be careful. I'm not sure what's worse, the funny names or the weird ones that defy spelling.

You were lucky Candie!j

K8 it's probably the only scene I really know off by heart! I sort of lose it by Incontinentia Buttocks. Poor bastard!

Got a funny name Gleds?

Conor I imagine some of the Dutch spellings lend themselves to a giggle or two. I had a boss called Henk Stool!

Aww Nance that's just unfortunate, I'd have kept my maiden name I think.

Wuffa, Warwick was close enough. Out here it's pronounced Warrack . .

Oh Brian, even Rick Dick is funny!

Hey Terence it was Monday, needed a shit and a giggle!

We aim to please Megan!

steph said...

Your children wouldn't have thanked you if your surname was Zapple or Voyant...

Adam Zapple and Clare Voyant


Ropi said...

Well, rather I don't say anything about the historic accuracy of the scene but it is quite funny so it is not on my Index.

nick said...

Gender-ambiguous names can be confusing if not embarrassing. Startling when Sam turns out to be a woman or Pat turns out to be a man. And in Italy of course Nicola and Andrea are both male names.

jay said...

Took me a while to get 'Barb Dwyer' ROFL!

Some of those are just downright cruel. I did know a man once called John Thomas, and he was such a shy serious guy, too. I often wonder if the shyness and seriousness was a result of the name he was burdened with or not.

Melissa said...

LOL!! I love it! My sister's foot doctor was Dr. Corn. And my family doctor in high school was Dr. Superdock. :D There's a nurse practitioner around here named ... Nurse Hellebusch. Ouch.

kj said...

and claudia cling and pat mcgroin.

claudia cling did not think her name was a bit funny. at that point i muffled my laugh

xo baino

Kath Lockett said...

I went to school with a Peter Nuss, who must have dreaded the morning roll call:
K Read ? Here (that was me)
P Nuss? loud sniggers all round.

River said...

Oooh! Life of Brian-haven't watched that in ages
I don't know anyone that has an unfortunate name combination.

laughingwolf said...

sorry sub... that should teach me to read what others post ;)

Baino said...

Very erudite Steph!

Oh Ropi! I don't think Monty Python had historical accuracy on their mind at the time! It's juvenille but that was there charm!

Nick I used to work with a Jodie and he was a bloke! We have a client called Tracy and Robin/Robyn always gets me confused.

Jay one of my friends was going to Christen her son John Thomas until we pointed out the error of her ways . . she'd never heard of the phrase and settled in the end for James!

Haha . .Classics Mellissa! Love Dr Superdock! Inspires confidence don't you think?

kj you're too cruel!

Kath that poor kid! I wouldn't have sniggered! (Much)

River I used to have a copy on Video but now I can't find it on DVD!

Yeh Wuffa! Pay attention!

Miladysa said...

Emma Roydes ;D

Grannymar said...

I worked with a guy call William Patrick, he was always referred to as Willie P! There was a firm of publishers in Belfast called Reid and Wright!