Thursday, September 03, 2009

Beginning (Again)

Theme Thursday takes us back to 'Beginning' . . so because I'm tired after stretching out my hours to a 45 hour week, I'm tired of sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic for 90 minutes and frankly I'm suffering incredible Blogger's Block . . .I've decided to go back to this blog's beginning. This is my first post:

I've been calling myself an old boiler since I was well, a spring chicken but it's suddenly dawned on me that I really am. My daughter says I drive like a geriatric and my son says I smell like elephant brains . . I think both were meant to be terms of endearment but I took them darkly. I decided to start a blog after being thoroughly entertained by the streams of younglings who expose their lives, dreams, hopes aspirations, drinking and sexual habits all in some cathartic or maybe it's an exhibitionist way to vent, reflect or just to document their day to day existence - either way it's a voyeur's paradise in blogworld.

Not that I'm a voyeur just a Sunday surfer . . .and not that I have anything as interesting to offer I just thought I'd have a bash. My interest was also sparked by a couple of e-friends who I've adopted through my business life and we've become good pals although we've never met and I'm old enough to be their mother. Tempted as I was, I've never lied about my age to these e-buddies but they seem to enjoy the occasional banter with some client in Sydney even though it's highly unlikely they'll ever share a joke let alone a beer. I suppose I'm a safe proposition, fun when it suits . . no commitment . . . Addicted as I am to some blogs, all written by people who I have never met and probably never will . . I decided to start my own journal.

Even if it's not nearly as entertaining as some. I now know, I can get things out in the open without boring my children, MSN'ing my tiny contact list of computer literate peers or at the very least have something that my overseas mates can log into from time to time to gauge just how tragic the middle ages (mine that is) can be. First place of choice was 'My Space' but realising that there are no postings for people over the age of 40, I turned away, spurned, hurt and cut to the core because I'm not 40, not even 45 but only a matter of weeks on the right side of 50 and that dear readers is what cuts me to the core.

Inside, I'm fabulous . . .young, spirited, thoughtful, feisty . . Christ, I listen to Triple J - I can't be that old, my girlfriend rides a motorbike in races for heaven's sake . . .I say fuck and like the Foo Fighters . . . but every now and then, my alter ego surfaces, that grumpy old woman that laments kids today because they don't know the art of conversation, it's all done via SMS on mobile phone or hieroglyphic messages on some chat line :), (: , :P, BTW, IMHO . .

Alternatively, that anal woman occupies my body and freaks out unnecessarily about the way a towel is strewn all over a bed or loses the plot because shoes are not neatly placed together and God forbid if anyone gets instant coffee granules in the sugar or leaves the toilet seat up - because the world as we know it will end.

Then there's that weeping mess of a waste of womanhood that just bursts into rivers of saltiness because someone left the door open or let the dog out or didn’t' make their bed or was so selfish that they couldn’t bloody be bothered to go up and buy some milk when they know all I want in life is a CUP OF TEA IN THE MORNING!!!!!!!

Not to mention . . .that ballistic bombshell of spiralling overconfidence, the legend in her own lunchtime, that Amazonian decision maker with supreme knowledge grounded in nothing but sheer belief in her ability!

In a nutshell, that's me . . .

I look in the mirror and see a tall, slim, dark-haired, brown eyed beauty with a face full of character and charm. A smile that would melt the ice caps and velvety skin that any man would find simply irrisistable. What's really there is a mere semblence of my formal self, not so many wrinkles but I've just about forgotten what my original hair colour is . . frequently tinted to hide the grey. My sylph like figure has well quite simply ballooned so now I really am a woman of substance and my skin . . well, nothing a 10 week acid peel regime can't fix.

Resolution for today: Remove all reflective surfaces from view.


Well that's it and clearly, my contact with gamers since this post has acquainted me with l33tspk and 'w00t', has become one of my favourite words!

Wouldn't it be great if we could just start all over and make a new beginning.





Massive thanks to GrannyMar and K8 the Gr8 because they commented on this post and they're still following me three years later. Ilovez yous both! And humungous thanks to all of you for your visits and comments. I love it, I really do. This is one thing I would not do differently if I could go back to the beginning.

42 comments:

Mim said...

I have the same lying mirrors in my house, do you think that they are manufactured by and populated in our world from a far away evil empire consisting of peach-ripe 19 year old sylph-like GIRLs? I believe in these conspiracies.

otin said...

I did not realize that you have been blogging for 3 years! That is a long stretch. I hope that I make a year!!!

K8 the Gr8 said...

Lolz at the lack of milk in the morning! I go uncharictaristically ape at that too... it would probably be easier just to go and buy a cow.

subtorp77 said...

***shudder***instant coffee! The horror! And I did not know that about MySpace( glad I don't use it ). But don't beat yourself up over it, Baino. We are who we are, right? The biggest problem is no-one wants to look past the outer veil, so to speak, and have a natter with one's inner self. That's where things truly begin...talk to yourself first.

And still wondering what elephant brains smell like? Where'd he come up with such a bonkers idea as that? HUGS to you luv :)

Brian Miller said...

actually elephant brains are pretty exotic and driving slow allows you to appreciate the finer small details...so i think that is what they were saying. you caught most of your other good qualities as well. and because of them, we love you. 3 years is a bit of time...i saw a comment from you somewhere about 1000 posts and it caught me...congrats...i hope you make it many more.

Kate said...

Wahey!!! And you haven't changed a bit have you?????

I got to work on Tuesday morning after horrendous traffic fighting to find that my boss had removed the fridge freezer and given it to his mother-in-law - he figured her wrath at being without a fridge would be worse than mine being without coffee... how wrong he was!!!!

Keep on blogging Baino!!

Rowe said...

Baino, again, you have expressed some of my own sentiments. I'm 2 years shy of 50 and I also listen to Triple J because they play good music minus the commercials (and other BS) and the commercial music which I mostly dislike anyway. So, where do you shop for clothing, may I ask, that is becoming a growing problem lately, finding what fits, looks good and does not cost the earth. My 20 yo son has decks and asks me (ME!!) what I think of some of the tracks he spins, hoo hoo, a gen yer, my own son, trusts my taste in music.

Sarah Lulu said...

What a wonderful post!

I frequently start my year over ...say mid, well, any month really ...

If it all seems too much I throw out even my work diary and buy a new one.

Roy said...

Heh, heh! You're the Energizer bunny - three years and still running! And yeah, I know all about those looks in the mirror. I've stopped looking.

Oh look, my verification word is ganousch. If they mean baba ganoush, maybe I'll have to look into that at lunchtime. Lebanese for lunch, anybody?

Leah said...

What a wonderful idea, and a wonderful first post! I loved reading this.

My first post was a paragraph about knitting socks.

nick said...

What a great post. Right from the start you revealed your multiple identities in the same skin! I can certainly identify with that odd mix of laid-back acceptance and fastidious rage! I hope three years on you've at least nailed the morning milk problem.

Blogging IS a bit of a voyeur's paradise, isn't it, spying on everyone else's lives, quite often without their even knowing. Well, they can always spy on me in return....

jay said...

"Resolution for today: Remove all reflective surfaces from view."

Hahaha!! I've often felt that that was the way to go! Don't worry, I'm an old boiler too. You learn to live with it. LOL!

And Blogger's Block will go away. ;)

Candie Bracci said...

And I'm glad you did start blogging cause I'm glad to know you Baino!I love your blog and everything you write here.Thanks for Tracy Chapman too,I like her!
Have a wonderful day!

e said...

I love your blog even if you are a bit burned out on blogging. Thanks for sharing your first post and kicking my behind a time or two! Have a good one. I raise my cup of decaf to you!

Alan Burnett said...

Why could I find no link to this on the TT page? Luckily I have my own ever-present link to your blog which is as well as I would have hated to miss this. It is interesting to see why and how we started our blogs and a good exercise to go back to them occasionally.

Darlene said...

Three years is certainly a milestone; especially so if you are working full time.

I have nothing else to do and find that I have bloggers block after just one year. Nonetheless, I will keep on posting even if it's drivel. Or until my followers are kind enough to tell me it's time to stop. ;-)

reyjr said...

wow - you're the same age as my parents. :D

lol @ the OC-ness. I found it funny because I'm like that sometimes. :p

Very nice intro to your blog. :D

Colette Amelia said...

OK this is so wonderful on so many fronts...and I think in thinking about my yesterday's post that who the hell needs Justin Trudeau...do you do eulogies?

bravo!

Miladysa said...

OMG - We're the same woman only you've got the balls and say what I would love to!

Awesome post Baino - keep on blogging x

Tom said...

happy to have read that, and happier yet that after 3 years you're still at it! Sometimes it is tough to find something interesting to blather on about! Thanks much for stopping in to visit, even if you don't understand...just glad that you bother! Toodles.

Grannymar said...

A little late, but I AM STILL HERE! I don't envy you that commute from work at the end of a long day.

You do ye Olde Blogging well, just keep going. I enjoy my trips down under. Right now I am struggling with my topic for tomorrow.

laughingwolf said...

almost always hated work commutes, esp when work began at 7 bloody 30 in the morning and i needed more than an hour, one way!

keep on ticking, baino :)

...dunno how long kenny will live, what with the two conditions he has :'(

Cinnamon said...

This is fascinating- so eloquently written. Not that I am surprised- but then again I am surprised because you seem so confident from the start. I can't remember what my first post was, and I don't dare to look- I am sure it would be cringy. Baino- this is something you can be really proud of!

Baino said...

Mim, it's a travesty. I tried installing low wattage globes in the bathroom, they work. Shame the mirrored lift at work has bright fluorescent lights!

Otin, you will but burn out hits now and again

K8 if I can't have two cups of tea in the morning I'm a grouch for the rest of the day. Adam is the master at leaving just enough for me but not enough for Clare's porridge. Buy a cow! Dunno about that but I'd have a cow without milk in my tea!

Subby it's just a weekday thing but it is Moccona! I plunge on the weekends. My son is a master of strange insults he is indeed bonkers.

Thank you Brian, I feel much better now, I didn't notice how many posts I'd done until a couple of weeks ago. Big celebration coming up.

Haha; . . well Kate you all know a lot more about me now I guess! Srsly, I sat in what should have been a 30 minute drive for 90 minutes. They're going to open our road up to divert traffic and reckon there will be 10,000 cars coming through at peak hour . .oh joy! And there's no kerb and guttering or street lighting!

Oh Rowe you have a 2 year old, she'll keep you young! Yeh, my boy is also a muso I've been a drummy mummy for years! He can pack his own drums these days!

Yeh I'm a bit of a tosser too Sarah!

Heh! Roy time for some preparation H, the secret unwrinkler used by models I believe!

Leah, knitting socks is a noble pursuit. I can't knit a scarf!

Yeh, these days I think I enjoy reading others' blogs rather than writing them Nick.

Jay, I guess we have no choice but to live with it but I'm not ready for the pastel twin set just yet!

Thanks Candie, it does open up a world of joy and sadness and everything in between. I love it really. I'd love Tracey Chapman's hair!

Oh e! I'm never going to live that down am I? Nah, I just like to know that those who stop posting for a while are alive and well and distracted by other things. Which is usually the case.

Bollicks. Did I forget to add me . . right hopping over now - there, I'm back on the list. I entered twice last week and forgot this week! See, I am getting old

Darlene I do have trouble keeping up sometimes and I don't post daily anymore but it's therapy for me and tv is so awful that it's a welcome diversion most of the time

Erm thank you youngling! I don't need any more reminding you cheeky pup! Yeh, I'm a bit of a tidy freak, not that you'd notice this morning, the place is a mess!

Interestingly Colette, I've written three Eulogies for friends . . I haven't read them but have written them. The only one I wrote for a family member was for my Dad. That was easy because we knew we were going to lose him and a tribute seemed fitting.

Mildady . I have gumption, not testicles! And I don't mean the white paste bathroom cleaner although I have that as well.

Haha . . Tom, I love your weirdness and your drawings. I swear if I ever get a tatoo I'm going to base it on your doodles.

You are my love and I appreciate it immensely. We've travelled a long road you and I GrannyMar and I hope we keep it up for a long time to come!

Wuffa, it's a pain in the ass. At least where I'm working here, I can arrive at work anywhere between 7:30am and 10am and come home any time between 4pm and 7:30pm so I usually try to wangle it so that I can dodge peak hour. I think I'm going to start taking the bus. Poor little pup, very sad and disappointing for you, just keep him comfy that's all you can do and arrange another doggy as soon as you can.

Marianna said...

Haven't you heard, 50 is the new 20 dear!

Love your posts and here's to another 3 years of blogging :)

xoxo

Betsy said...

My favorite line...
Inside, I'm fabulous . . .young, spirited, thoughtful, feisty :)

Wings said...

We are never the same on the outside as we feel on the inside. At least, not for long. For the rest of the long years, we are that person trapped in some other shell!

liza said...

This is a great beginning into the new world of blogging. Glad to see you've stuck it through three years of sharing, posting and caring for your fellow bloggers. There may be a gap in age but man can I relate to you! Happy TT!

Harnett-Hargrove said...

...grounded in nothing but sheer belief in her ability! That would be enough for me
Great FIRST!
-Jayne

kj said...

baino, you are a doll. you have a great face, a great spirit, a great wit, and a great humor. and you are a great friend.

i LOVED reading your first blog. how interesting. and now you have these faithful friends and followers, i among them, who wouldn't dare miss your posts.

you are COOL hells. i know because i am COOL too. fabulous, young, spirited, thoughtful, feisty: yup, that's you. :)

that said, is it time to spice things up a bit? i don't mean on your blog.

sincerely,
your faithful and admiring friend,
ms. kj

River said...

I liked reading this, but now, dammit, I have to go back and read my way forward through your archives......

Taffy's Mum said...

One day I will start my own blog when I have access to the computer at home instead of sneaking peaks at work! Your post is inspiration for me to pull my finger out and get blogging - watch this space!

Baino, your posts on your trips out and about remind me to keep saving for my next trip down under as I have lots of friends in the Northern suburbs of Sydney and your posts remind me how much I love it and that I must get back to see them all!

Baino said...

Thank you Marianna I'll take that on board. Apart from the creaky knees I feel 20 frankly. Hence the removal of reflective surfaces.

That's me . . and hopelessly insecure, can you believe it Betsy. Really I am.

Too true wings. Nature is cruel. Although I scrub up OK for an old boiler. I just wish I could prevent the force of gravity, everything's heading south.

It hasn't been hard Liza really. A nice stress release at the end of the day. And the people I've met have frankly been wonderful.

Haha . . it's true Jayne. . .I'm still giggling re the Antwerp vid. So cool. Mouse aka Kimy put it up on Facebook! Very impressed we were.

Oh you . .*blush* well beats being a crusty marshmallow! And re the spice I tell you I'm trying. The only single men within my 12 year window either way, these days are on the blogs and live 12,000 miles away! Fat chance!

Hey River. Nah don't bother, it's all same ol same ol

Hello stranger, haven't seen you around for a while. Well if ever you do, I have a sofa bed with your name on it, I love visitors. I'll try to do ol Sinny justice over the weekend. The sun is supposed to be shining and I'll be out and about mit camera in hand. And just quietly, you and River should start your own blogs, (She wont . I've brow-beaten her enough) but you should!

unstranger said...

Superb.

kj said...

you know, darling, i think of you as a crusty marshmellow and i just love you that way, but i don't use the term anymore because i think it didn't sit well with you. right?

and as for trying: just keep your eyes open and your vibes channel wide open. any one who would have you would also have passion (my favorite), steadiness, action, and common sense. are you a good cook?

xoxox truly

Bimbimbie said...

Tsup*!* Tsup*!* Tsup*!*

Ah praise be for being a geriatric elephant brain and serving up food for thought via your blog ;)

laughingwolf said...

the breeder asked if she can accompany me when i take kenny in for an ultrasound, hopefully next week... i said: of course

she and her friends think this vet's diagnosis is flawed, and can't wait til the clinic owner [her vet, too] gets back from a vet seminar in france...he'll do the ultrasound

California Girl said...

Baino, you've been entertaining from the get go. You and I would get along so well.

Dreamhaven said...

I've only been blogging for 3 months. I love the variety of people and points of view. Happy TT

lettuce said...

I love finding out about how and why bloggers started.

ha! i just had to go back to my own blog to check how long i've been blogging. thats age for you...
about 3 and a half years for me.

excellent response to the Theme, this is my fave. so far

Not For Jellyfish said...

Fabulous to remember how you started here in the first place...

tony said...

Never remove those reflective surfaces! 2 Great Posts!