Fuckwit and have been reprimanded on many levels. I've just been busy and distracted.
It's now Saturday night, Clarebear is christening her new contacts and practicing her moves with two men I've never met. (Dont!). Adam and the Front Row Forward (formerly the Fringelet but she eats like a footballer) have pissed off for some Saturday night housewarming so I am at last, alone and able to catch up. Chardy in hand, house clean and tidy, washing done and the entire block pruned or pwned to within an inch of it's botanical life. Been a big day.
My suspicions were confirmed today that those big-fuck-ass-buy-designer-frames-and-get-rubbish-for-$600 shops where you go and get your eyes tested and then are pressured into buying the Chanel frames with transition lenses and anti-glare film and graduated optical lenses are, in fact, a rip off. OK I'm a slow learner.
About 12 months ago I went to the big-fuck-ass-buy-designer-frames-and-get-rubbish-for-$600 shop and was suckered into Burberry frames, graduated lenses and anti-glare for the cool sum of around $600! My health fund covered the lenses but I only received $150 off the frames. They've been crap. Seriously crap. They have those little clear nosepeggy things which give me sinus headaches, never fit, leave dings either side of the bridge of my nose and I've taken them back over 50 times to be 'adjusted'.
My sister came over for coffee last weekend with a flash new pair of specs. Nicely angled and a sort of deep sea blue frame, very sexy. She bragged that they'd cost less than $200 and that ThePlumber had also acquired two pairs of Neo Matrix style sunnies and normal glasses for a song.
Clarebear who finds seeing a soccer ball on a pitch and impressing men in clubs with her amazing dance moves a bit trixy without her specs, decided to investigate and has walked away with 30 day's worth of contact lenses plus a 4 day 'try before you buy' deal and is pleased as punch.
So I made an appointment and this morning, she and I headed off to Hornsby uber discount can't remember the name of the spectacle warehousey place to pick up her contacts and get me a new pair . . I'm interviewing for jobs folks so need to look spiffy and being able to actually see my interviewer is a distinct advantage.
So, today. I walks in to the super-dooper-discount-specky place and decide I want solid acrylic frames. The nice lady behind the counter who turns out to be the sister-in-law of The Benchwarmer (I mean how many Damjanovski's do you know?) suggests that she can remove the awful hard plastic nose dingers and wack in a couple of soft silicone ones that shouldn't hurt my schnozz - fer free folks! No charge. Unfortunately, with all the tweaking and adjusting and bending . . the metal holding the little plasticky put-a ding-in-your-schnozz thing fell off! She was very remorseful and suggested I go back to big-fuck-ass-buy-designer-frames-and-get-rubbish-for-$600 shop for a refund. Which I fully intend to do.
Anyway . . ClareBear gets her contacts and behaves like someone touched by Jesus "Oh my God I can see . .I can read that sign, I can see those flowers . . .these are awesome." So while I leave her to plonk around Westfield and come to terms wtih her newly spec free face and ability to read from 80 metres that there is actually 40% off at Sportsgirl, I have a chat and a consultation with Mr Hong the hilarious Chinese optometrist. I know Chinese and hilarious don't really go together but this guy was.
Now he is not your normal optometrist. He's not on commission, he's not making any dosh out of the frames. He works for a salary but does do some locum work with, you guessed it big-fuck-ass-buy-designer-frames-and-get-rubbish-for-$600 shop . .
In 20 minutes, he gave me a script, tested for the usual nasties, commented on the high proportion of shopping centres in Kellyville, declared my previous lenses as total crap, bought for peanuts by said big-fuck-ass-buy-designer-frames-and-get-rubbish-for-$600 shop and sold on at premium prices to ensure their margins and assured me that my new, rather smik goggles would be ready by Wednesday, all for the handsome premium of $70! S-E-V-E-N-T-Y now that's cheap by anyone's standards.
Excellent. I love Mr Hong and his pretty acrylic russet frames!
Then I went to buy a corporate outfit for interviews and came home with two pairs of black comfy yoga pants and a nice red hoodie! Doh! God life's exciting at the Bainbridge Homestead, aint it just?
There will be proper pictures when I pick them up. I need your opinion as to whether I look professional enough to get the job in $70 specs and a red hoodie.
I just love this song . .my mother used to play it on the piano . . .
I'm still getting stuck in some of your spam boxes . .Hails? K8? Anyone else not had a comment for a while, please check and release me!