Thursday, February 21, 2008

It Bites

Shitty day today. 'nuf said. I am watching "Getaway" a holiday program on TV. Sucker for punishment but one holiday held me in awe. A riding holiday through the Rocky Mountains outside Alberta Canada:

When I have to put up with this, seriously, I've squished 3 in the past 5 minutes brazen hussies. It's only the females that bite. They're seriously attuned to carbon dioxide emissions and exacting temps so I am obviously running hot and breathing deep tonight!

I don't even 'welt' up any more . . just get the itchy's for a couple of minutes but these sneaky bitches know where to attack. Between your toes! On the soles of your feet (the tickly bits) and on your eyelids (puffy problem) but I do object to them falling in me chardy!

Now what was on the scales . . Cold Rocky's . . . mosquito coast . . . um cold Rocky's . . mosquito coast . . . it's a no brainer! I have finally lodged my British and Australian Passport applications . . Northern November . . fantabulistic!


Grannymar said...

'Northern November' We might even have some summer weather for you by then!

Nick said...

A few months back Jenny and I took the Rocky Mountaineer train through the Rockies from Vancouver to Calgary (700 miles). An amazing experience, strongly recommended.
Glad there are few mosquitos hereabouts. I was once bitten furiously in Florence and arrived in Rome with my face covered in hideous bites like a leper.

ian said...

Going to BC in July, but only as far as the Selkirks. Herself's great uncle was a prospector there a century ago.

Be careful juggling your passports, make sure you go out on the same one you came in on - immigration can get snotty. I had friends who went into Vancouver on their Canadian passports and decided to return home on their Irish ones - problem arose when Canadian immigration couldn't find the entry stamps.

Anonymous said...


No wait.. I don't want to know.

Terence McDanger said...

Mozzies? You should try being caught in a cloud of midges near an Irish bog on a summer's Eve.

The only upside is they don't give you Malaria.

Absolute Vanilla (& Atyllah) said...

You're lucky the hussies don't affect you - I itch for ages and if I get bitten by tropical mozzies, I swell up like a watermelon! They are the work of Satan, I tell you.

Quickroute said...

didn't know about the "carbon dioxide emissions and exacting temps" - perhaps that's why I get devoured and the missus is unscathed or do I just have sweet blood!

Baino said...

GrannyMar: I'm not betting on it but I like the cold!

Nick: poor thing. I had chicken pox in Tassie once does that count! I've seen the train trip. Very pretty but I'd rather ride.

Ian: Lucky thing. I always fancied Christmas in Banff or Lake Louise but my travels will take me to wherever Ms Clare is at the time. Hopefully England and Ireland. If so, I'll travel on the British one. It's more to get me motivated to save, save save!

K8: out of the gutter girly. A chad is a glass of chardonnay! One landed plonk in the middle!

Terrence: Then clearly, don't go hanging around bogs on warm summer evenings! I don't think we have malaria here. Just Ross River Fever!

AV: We did get 'school sores' as children. Infected mozzie bites that developed into impetigo I guess that's how we built resistance. My cousin visited a few years ago and ended up unable to open one of her eyes for days! She lives here now and they don't bother her at all.

Qickroute: They're attracted by C02 but will only bite if your temperature is just right. The itchness is an allergy to the anticoagulant the little beggers inject to make your blood more digestible. Only females bite when they're incubating eggs. Biatches!

I think their only possible use on the planet is to annoy and diminish the population through disease.

Anonymous said...

Well those biathes are trying to rid my family first! Have BIG allergy to the anticoagulant and we must ALWAYS be the right temperature. Has nothing to do with all the birdbaths outside ... ;)

Thriftcriminal said...

Apparently they dont like vitamine B. So lash the berocca into you and stand next to someone lacking in the B vits :-)

gayƩ said...

Ugh, between the toes, that's nasty!!!!
I read somewhere that global warming monster is the kindest to these creatures.
Can you use a repellent or something? One of those you plug in perhaps?

Baino said...

Anony: come and live next door and attract my mozzies!

Thrifty:Is that so? I can live with the mozzies if they just buy their own booze!

Gaye: Their buzz is worse than their bite. My biggest injuries are sustained thwacking the side of my head in half-sleep when I hear that whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine

nonny said...

Are you coming over to see us Baino? I hated the bugs and flied in Oz I got eaten alive, the little fuckers just bit me on purpose.

Baino said...

Well yes Nonnymouse. The plan is to meet up with my wayward child some time in November . . only problem she could be anywhere between Belfast and the Costa del Sol so . .who knows. Just keep your eye out for a fat mama with a Khathmandu backpack and a pair of sensible shoes asking "What country am I in and could you please tell me what day it is?"

Sorry 'bout the mozzies they can pick tourists quicker than Grandad!

nonny said...

Well if you are in this neck of the woods we'll have to meet for drinkies!!