Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Can't Get a Word In Edgeways

Just finished listening to Jefferson Davis Podcast once again although despite having a hangover, poor Jefferson barely gets a word in edgeways thanks to Brianf and Grandad rambling on about Whiskey, the good old days, urban development (bring it on I say - develop my holding!) the last days on earth and faux pas with the Queen.

  • I lurve the accents. Dario Sanchez you’re a cack and that’s a good thing. Chin up youngling. Grandad speaks well, very clearly and concisely but has a very droll sense of humour. Brian is an East Coast yank who does an amazing impersonation of Canadians, making them sound exactly like Bulkwinkle and some really loopy ideas about the end of the Mayan Calander. Jefferson has a strong Southern Drawl and a laugh that sounds like he’s just done something really naughty and is covering his tracks – poor thing has to compete for space on his own podcast.
  • I want development please! Just where I live mind you . . . I'm sitting on 21 x 700sq metre building blocks that no developer wants to buy thanks to the real estate slump - it's my superannuation plan! *sob*
  • It was actually not John Major (ex English PM) or John Howard (current Aussie PM) but Paul Keating, Prime Minister of the day who put his arm around the Queen’s waist whilst introducing her during her last tour of Australia. Little Johnny Howard would be much more politically correct. These days we are in favour of the Danish Royals thanks to Princess Mary – good Tassie girl who met the boy in a pub during the 2000 Olympics – now there’s a fairy tale romance.
  • I think we’re more likely to fall into a black hole than succumb to the Mayan holocaust – and actually the Mayans died out because they deforested their environment to produce lime as a coating for their incredibly monumental buildings, this in turn dried up the swamps that they used to fertilise their corn terraces. They were possibly the first environmental pirates. The 2012 reference I believe, is to a specific astronomical alignment which will produce a sort of ‘dark’ rip in the night stky if the night is clear enough. We’ll be fine until 2050 when the World Wildlife Fund says we will have reached the point of no return on carbon emissions if we don't change our ways by 2010.
  • I worry about the amount and range of alcohol you all drink, you make me look like a beginner and a cheap wino. Dario, you’re 18 for crying out loud, I’m glad Whiskey isn’t your drink of choice. Should be Vodka and Red bull or Yaegermeister or something. Brian – TicTac? Enough said. Grandad, you have taste. I don’t drink Whiskey but my Father was also a fan of the Jameson, just with a dash of water, no ice. Try and grab the glass from him after he’d dozed off and you’d feel his vice like grip – not bad for an unconscious bloke!
  • Jefferson – Apple and Raspberry cordial before bed – rehydrates the brain and prevents the 3.00am alcoholic thirsts.
  • And thanks for the mention Brian! I am flattered, two ‘hooray’s’ in as many weeks. I would have accepted the invite to join in but I think an aussie accent amongst you lot and we'd need a bevy of babel fish to understand each other! It's nice to hear your voices.

5 comments:

Brianf said...

Well I think all the different accents would be cool. JD's southern, Grandad's D4, Darios Cyaaavan and your Aussie. Now of course I don't have an accent, yous' guys' do. I would also like to get Dodge and Shifty on as well. That would a GREAT podcast. A true cast od Characters!
Me, Jefferson, Dr. Don, Grandad, Dario, You, Dodge and Shifty

Grandad said...

Ohboy! Am I mad now! Am I building up to a murderous rage!

Brianf!! You ***** ****** **er. What the **** do you mean "D4"???????

Don't you know that is about the WORST thing you can say about anybody? I demand an instant retraction, or you'll be hearing from my solicitors.

Apart from that - Hi Baino :)

Sorry about the mixup with the queen! Especially after all the nice things you said about me.

I am a very nice person.

Except when people who haven't a clue what they're talking about say I have a D4 accent.

Baino said...

Perhaps it's just as well you are separated by the tyranny of distance! Grandad sounds pissed off. What's D4 a map reference? I know 5 Irish people and they all sound so different. I think Grandad's English ma might have had something to do with his diction and pronunciation. Don't fight now lads! It's becoming a habit on this blog.
As for the multicultural podcast, it would be like a bucket full of crushed crabs!

Grandad said...

:)

Dario apparently told Brian that I had a Dublin 4 accent. [What would Dario know? He's from Cavan, or should I say 'Cyaaaavan'!]

The D4 is a put on accent developed by pretentious twats who think they are "so frightfully upper class". I hesitate to try phonetics, but they end most sentences with "roysh" and "Yeaa" ['right' and 'yes']. Bob Geldoff had one for a while, but he's watered it down a lot.

I was chatting to Brian yesterday, and we had a good laugh about it. I don't get pissed off that easily!!

Dario Sanchez said...

As pointed out now, I am a sambuca man.

And Grandad, you sound like a crisper Bob Geldof, as if he hadn't taken drugs in his youth. As I'm from the country, allSouth Dublin accents sound D4-ish to me.