Monday, June 09, 2008

Chips Gravy and Other Useless Information

Since I am absolutely hungover from overimbibing during a family lunch yesterday which concluded at 9pm and after about 8 bottles of very good red and chardy, I have little to offer. Many brain cells have been relegated to moosh but Kath Lockett tagged me and saved the day. Go on, have a go, you know you want to!

What was I doing 10 years ago?

Much the same as I'm doing now. I've been in stasis for the past 10 years. I had a 13 year old daughter and 11 year old son, little money to rub together as my savings dwindled and working in the public service with great hours and crap money. Social life was largely 'at home' events with friends BYO barbecues with the exception of a season ticket to the Ensemble Theatre. We did a lot of camping which was fun. I had one of those trailer tents that I could easily erect by myself with only a little help required from kids "hold that pole" in order to erect the annex. Another joy (read moment of madness) of that time was buying horses and being able to ride over the back with my daughter, and son on a bike in tow, before all the new houses went in. Life was simple and uncomplicated and comprised largely of work and an over absorption with tweens.

Five snacks I enjoy in a perfect, non weight-gaining world

I'm not much of a snacker to tell the truth. Often a day goes by and it's 3.00 before I realise that I haven't eaten anything. Hence my propensity to carry weight, my body is in constant 'famine' mode but here goes:

Hot chips and gravy from the local chippy which hasn't suffered since the Greeks moved out and the Koreans moved in.

Phoques Cove King Island brie with lavosh and strawberries - I never quite worked out how to pronounce 'Phoques'.

Iced coffee without the cream (you get more iced coffee that way)

Baileys Irish cream on ice (now reserved to Christmas only)

I'm pushing for a fifth . . .probably a Wendy's Mocha Chiller or Boost's All Berry Bang!

Five snacks I enjoy in the real world

MS mini-chocolates on the reception desk at work, 70cents each (I do it for charity - honestly)

Bacon Lettuce and Tomato toasted sandwiches. The sort of healthy snack if you forget the mayonnaise

Pistachio nuts, salted and in the shell except pick the shells up off the floor they hurt like tiny pieces of lego if you tread on them in bare feet

Prawns . . .Queensland tigers, in the shell. Not quite a snack but a treat nonetheless.

Wholegrain vitawheet and Vegemite, for some reason these have the regular habit of dislodging old fillings and result in remedial dentistry. The most expensive snack I've had this year.

Five things I would do if I were a billionaire:

Pay off my debts and the kid's HECS bills

Buy the block next door to my sister, clear all the crap away and build a dream house

Donate a sizeable amount to homeland charities like the Salvation Army or the Smith Family. Charity begins at home.

Travel . . Paris first . . then perhaps Scandinavia and spend Christmas in the snow all snooxed up with a blazing fire and a turkey feast. Then map a path around the world to visit bloggers and overseas friends.

Hire a personal trainer to force me to shift my ass and get into a regular exercise regime

Five jobs that I have had:

Strawberry picker - it wasn't very successful I was fired after 1 day for eating the profits. I didn't mind, it was hard on the knees and was only paid $1.50 an hour.

Chicken packer at KFC from 16-21, fun times since most of my family and friends also worked there. It paid for travel, a car and a horse and we got to take leftovers home at night to munch during the Saturday night creature feature. I never found out what was in the 11 secret herbs and spices, they arrived in plain white packets with no ingredients listed.

Girl Friday - can't call them that any more. Clerical support to two product managers. One of them had a hyphenated name and an awful stammer, it was hard not to laugh. I was 'broken in' with an old electric typewriter and carbon paper. Remember that . . white to the client, pink in the file . . .I never worked out what happened to the blue copy.

Copywriter/Marketing Coordinator in an in-house Creative Dept. for an American multinational. Great job. Did it for 15 years before being made redundant by an asshole called Michael Coldwell because he thought I threatened his rise to power. I guess I did, he's now Managing Director the prick.

Project Manager for a national policing agency. I was PA to the director and project manager for the National Fingerprint Identification System (NAFIS) replacement project. Did such a good job that Amanda Vanstone, the then Minister for Justice, granted our $50 million request to replace outdated technology and took the project to Canberra and laid everyone in Sydney off! Good parting package though so I wasn't bovvered . . .

Three of my habits:
Lapsing into smoking cigarettes more often than I would like

Having two cups of tea and one cup of coffee, every morning before I go to work. If one is missing, the day just doesn't start correctly . . is that a bit OCD?

Chewing the quick on my fingertips when I'm nervous

Five places I have lived:
I've lived in many more than five places but these were the best of them:

Born in Stockport Cheshire where I lived until I was 11 and we became 10 pound poms and emigrated to Australia

Donvale Melbourne where I began high school, bought my first horse and had my first kiss but didn't stay long enough to make many friends

Kings Cross - although my mother insisted it was Elizabeth Bay because it was a posh flat even if there was a call girl across the hall who insisted sitting naked in front of her window.

Parramatta, just across from the gaol in a tin box flat with 70's burnt orange benches and second hand furniture. Lived there just after I got married and had dinner parties on a fold away picnic set. If I stood on the toilet seat and peeked out of the bathroom window, I could actually see inmates being hosed off the roof during a prison riot. Also had our car stolen from the carpark and the man downstairs complain because we 'walked too heavily' across the lounge room.

Kellyville Sydney . . where I am now on five glorious acres being encroached upon by McMansions and civilisation and nosey neighbours who call the fire brigade every time we have a small pile burn because they think it's public land and we're causing a nuisance. A place where we once never had to lock cars or doors. Great place to raise kids, have parties, ride horses but plagued by a mass of ever dissiduous gum trees that have made me and my leaf blower inseperable.

Five people I want to get to know better:

I'm copying Kath here and tagging, because I really do want to get to know these people better. They're intelligent and intriguing and when I have my billion dollars I will certainly visit them in the real rather than the virtual world - if they'll have me that is!



Jefferson Davis




Grannymar said...

I consider myself tagged. It might take a week or ten days. I will be off to inspect a new love nest (Elly & George's ) during the week.

steph said...

Aww Gee - thanks! Baino

I might have to find a love nest to inspect too! ;-)

Hang in there and I'll give it a day.

Kath Lockett said...

Great post Baino. Love all your snacks and food except for the prawns - I'll let you have those all for yourself.

Baino said...

Oooh Granymar, how exciting. Don't forget your camera!

No pressure Steph, I'm not a big tagger, save it for a rainy day when there's nothing to bag about the Irish Health Services (hang on . . that could be a VERY long time!)

Thanks Kath, I'm partial to a tag and a meme.

Quickroute said...

Great post ! hangovers must agree with you! - I did the strawberry picking thing too! among other shitty jobs!

Anonymous said...

Ah family lunch....what a nice day/night....baino, the things I could say, but for a small fee I shall not...seeing as I was (unfortunately) the designated driver.....Happy Days....awww are you a bit poorly!!!

Baino said...

Anonymous yes I am, unusual for me to actually have a hangover but I was 'right locked' as my young Irish friend would say. I'm going to have to go back to drinking champagne. I can't hold my chardy! I think that's the first time I've ever fallen into bed without doing the washing up (except on bonfire nights) Disgusting behaviour from a woman my age. Twas good tho was it not?

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Fabulous blog - you have a great writing style and really fun and easy to read. I'll be back to read some more when I get some time.

ian said...


What about putting the Men's Shed Movement on to your list of charities?

Thriftcriminal said...

Smooth. I'll see to it that I get some answers up on my blog shortly. Hope the hangover has abated.

Nick said...

Grotty old Stockport, Cheshire eh? No wonder the family shipped out to Oz at the earliest opportunity.

Emperor Ropi said...

10 years ago I had just finished learning how to read and write.

Anonymous said...

Ten years ago I was dreading hitting double figures ...

Baino said...

MOB: Welcome, I've dropped over at yours once or twice too! The more the merrier.

Ian: I think I could do a whole post on sheds. What is it about a man and a shed? John Williams even wrote a song "All Australian Men Need a Shed". If there's any left over I'll swing a little your way.

Thrifty: thanks, I rarely tag but it's a good meme for a rainy day.

Nick: Now now, never insult ones birthplace. Actually I lived in Romily which was a lovely blend of urban and rural.

Ropi: No need to rub it in now!

Anonymous: Haha . . .15 days and you'll be all growed up!

Anonymous said...

HAHHAA, great you had a good long weekend for Queenie's Birthday Baino. I enjoyed this post!

Jefferson Davis said...

Aww...You know that I secretly love these things. I think your are intelligent, intriguing, and the cats pajamas too! :)

Chips and Gravy, aye? Ah yes, that is delightful snack especially when drunk. :)

You better quit that smoking!!!

In three months, you'll only have to come go to Ireland to see me! :)